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Sure, she has been to birthday parties before. But this time was different. It was for one of HER friends. She is only 3 after all and doesn't have a ton of friends. This particular friend is from dance class and her mom and I have become friends.
So, last weekend we wrapped up a present and I took both kids to the Mermaid/ Pirate Party. They had a BLAST and The Superhero has now decided he wants a Pirate Party too!
This was the first time being at a party where not everyone knew Diabetes was in our lives. It was kind of weird for me. I just did my thing off to the side and most parents didn't notice anything. (LOVE using a remote to bolus for the cupcake!)
Except this one mom. She saw me lift his shirt and check Dexie.
Of course, she didn't know it was a Dexie or what that even was. She asked me a while later "What was that under his shirt that you were checking?"
I was taken aback a little. In my world, everyone just knows that he has Diabetes and that is that. For a minute I forgot that she didn't already "know".
I simply answered "He has Diabetes and I was just checking his monitor". And I left it at that.
She didn't really need to know details.
And to be honest, I was just not in a "Let me explain Diabetes to you" kind of mood.
I just wanted to enjoy the chaos of a kid birthday without having to think about D too much.
After my "short" answer, I assumed that would be that and we would move on.
Then a bit later she asked "When was he diagnosed? How did you find out?"
Sigh.
I didn't really want to go into details. I just didn't feel like it. Did she really want to know that he was 18 months, almost died, and we are luck he is alive today?
"He was only 1 1/2 at the time. He got really sick and we took him to PCH. I had googled and that was that."
It felt weird to have this conversation with a stranger. I don't have to explain his diagnosis much these days. Our "circle" of friends all know what we deal with day in and day out.
After my very short explanation of the diagnosis, it wasn't mentioned again. Every now and then I could see her watching what I was doing. Checking Dex, giving insulin via remote, etc. Nothing else was said.
For the first time, I surprised myself for not going into more details.
I hadn't really thought about going to a party that didn't involve people who were already in the "know".
I never really thought about the fact that even though we will attend non-D events, that D really never leaves.
And I guess sometimes people will ask "What is that thing?".
Maybe next time I won't be caught so off guard so I can come up with a better answer to educate about D.
Maybe.
*Disclaimer: I am a mom of a T1 Diabetic child and a child with ITP/Asthma/Sleep Apnea. I am NOT a doctor. I just play one in real life. Please do not take anything in this post or any other post on this blog as medical advice. If you have questions or concerns of your own, please seek advice from your doctor.*
4 comments:
Funny...when Joe was first diagnosed, Diabetes was ALL I wanted to talk about. I wanted people to notice. Now, I am cool with it being "under-the-radar".
Glad the kids had a great time.
Some days are "educate the masses" days and other days a "short and sweet, if even that" days.
We have the right to choose. And that's OK.
Sure, we need people to understand, but that doesn't mean that we always have to be at the ready to give an in depth lecture on the ins and outs of D.
Sometimes, we just want to be part of the party!!
I totally get it. Sometimes it just gets exhausting having to explain, Sometimes you just don't want to deal with it! You did good. You explained just enough. That's all she needed to know.
Been there, too... sometimes you just want to deal with IT and enjoy the day without having to explain IT all and feel like your child stands out.
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