Saturday, July 23, 2011

Completely WIPED.

This is how I am feeling these days. Wiped. Drained. Exhausted. Burned out. Tired. You get it, right?

Maybe it is the 100+ degree weather we have in AZ for MONTHS on end this time of year.

Maybe it is living in this tiny apartment day in and day out with 2 small kids. Thank God we are MOVING soon. Can't wait to have more space.

Maybe it is that 4 weeks off from work was just not quite enough this year. School is about to start again and we, as teachers, have to come back a few weeks earlier than the students. And in virtual teaching job, we do NOT get the whole summer, just 4 weeks.

Maybe it is the endless doctor appointments I feel like our lives are consumed with.

Maybe it is that I have no idea how I am going to work with 2 kids home this year. The Superhero will be in pre-school, but it is only 1/2 days 4x per week. With the Princess and her ITP, I just have a hard time sending her to daycare. Plus the cost of daycare adds up. I will probably have to take it one week at a time. I am hoping to put her in at least 3-4 days per week for the first month or so of the school year. This would be a huge help to me and she would have a great time. I know the daycare will take great care of her, I would still be nervous though.

Maybe it is that my husband works SEVEN days per week. Weekdays at one job and the weekends at another. He is home for a few hours each day. And that is all. We miss having him home. But, for now, this is how it is going to continue.

Maybe it is that I almost never sleep through a night without a crying 2 year old joining me in my bed. She has NEVER slept through the night more than 10 times in her whole life and I am WORN OUT.

Not to mention the other kiddo with T1 Diabetes and it's constant care. Fortunately my awesome husband takes the night shift on this one.

Maybe it is a combination of EVERYHING.

Whatever it is, I am hoping to be "normal" again soon. I am usually the one who sees positive in everything negative. And it is true, there are positive things that can be seen from all of the above, but all I see today is gray clouds. I know they will go away at some point, but right now, I am just WIPED.

*Disclaimer: I am a mom of a T1 Diabetic child and a child with ITP/Asthma/Dysphagia. I am NOT a doctor. I just play one in real life. Please do not take anything in this post or any other post on this blog as medical advice. If you have questions or concerns of your own, please seek advice from your doctor.*


Alexis Nicole said...

Uugh! I feel your pain mama. We have a lot of similiarities I didn't know of. Its not easy completely overwhelming, and I think being stuck inside makes us focus on those things even more.

I hope things with the Princess get better and you get some well deserved rest!

Neverending Joy said...

HUGS, sweetie. I am so sorry - this is all so completely overwhelming. I miss you, and I'm praying for you! Hope to see you soon.

Leigh said...

I can't imagine why you feel wiped out! Lol. You are such a strong person and such a good mommy! I don't know how you do it. Hang in there. (((HUGS)))

Joanne said...

HUGS... sorry you're dealing with all that. I would be wiped too with everything you've described. Hoping something gives and some of the stress is relieved for you and your family.

Julie said...

You have my DEEPEST sympathy dear... I feel your pain....and it sounds like you have more going on than I do... the appts seem endless, work, 2 kids with D, etc, etc, etc...I hope you get a break soon!!!

Kelly said...

Sounds like it's everything adding up! Maddison never slept either:( I hope you catch some relief somewhere!

Meri said...

I remember being overwhelmed with little ones, and jobs that kept everyone away from eachother. I know how overwhelming it can be. All I can tell you is it doesn't last forever. I promise. Things change. Kids grow, and things get easier.

Hope things start getting easier for you soon! Love ya!

Hallie said...

I get it. The start of the school year is so hard. And all of it... It wears on you. I usually try to find the bright side, too. But it's hard. I've had a few dark days myself lately. And that's ok. Its always hard to feel cheery when you are so tired. ((hugs))

Shannon@ The New Normal Life said...

I am so sorry you are dealing with all this. I am sending you love and hugs from VA. I would be overwhelmed and wiped out to if I had to manage everything you are. Please know that we are here to support you if we can! Big hugs!!

Holly said...

I'm so sorry, Tracy. That IS a lot! Without your sleep, EVERYthing seems harder. Does your little princess nap? Maybe you could join her!?

Or maybe she needs a chart with incentives to help her make it through the night? Want me to send some stickers and prizes?? We have a pile of stuff my daughter wants to give away (seriously, already on my laundry room counter!)..a Snow White tiara, a Little Mermaid scepter, Cinderella clock, umm..other stuff, that's she's too "big" for! HAha! I'd be glad to help you! : )
I'll be praying for you to get some sleep, and for your family to have TiMe together. Hugs, girl! : )

Wendy said...

Oh, my friend.

I'm so sorry life is piled on top of you right now :(

I'll say a prayer that everything comes together. I know in my heart, it'll start to feel better when you guys move. I just know it. I can feel it.


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